The times they are a not changing

Hola amigos, wie gehts denn allderweil? It’s been a while so it’s time for another post it seems, and it might as well be about what is on everybody’s lips, the change in the Australian government. So here goes, bottoms up.

Hurray, the king is dead, long live the king.

Let us all rejoice for we are young and free of John Howard. No more Abbot, Andrews and Costello, no more Ruddock, just Rudd. And boy is he a fresh face or what?

Unlike Howard, Rudd plans to keep immigrants locked up in detention camps and is happy to have "seaworthy" refugee boats turned around before they reach Australian waters.

SIEV X all over. According to the SMH it’s a bit like this:

The measures bring Labor broadly into line with the coalition's policies.

"You would turn them back," Mr Rudd said of boats approaching Australia.

He said Labor believed in an orderly immigration system enforced by deterrence.

A Labor government would aim to deter asylum seekers by using the threat of detention and Australia's close ties with Indonesia.

Australia's close ties with Indonesia are indeed a threat. I am not sure about you, but to me that sounds like "we decide who will come to this country" in Mandarin. Following logic, in order for refugees to be deterred from trying to make it to Australian shores the conditions in the camps must be as unwelcoming as possible. Far more unwelcoming than a homeless shelter in Brisbane. Kevin Rudd as quoted in The Age:

He also declared himself passionate about tackling homelessness, after visiting three homeless shelters and spending several hours talking to residents there during the election campaign."I think we can do much, much better as a nation for people who don't have anywhere to stay or anywhere secure to stay," he said...

What a man. So hypocritically compassionate, so very Labor. If the human being who has nowhere save to stay is Australian, we can do so much more for her then provide shelter, if they are Non-Australian and got nowhere save to go, they can piss off. There is no other way says Kevin:

But, asked what was compassionate about turning back refugee boats or incarcerating asylum seekers on Christmas Island, Mr Rudd defended the immigration laws… "You've got to have an orderly migration system. The only way you have an orderly migration system is if you have an enforcement mechanism. What's the alternative? There isn't one," he said…

Lock'em up, the only way!!! Kids 'n all, in concentration camps with aggressive guard dogs waiting for a chance to bite. Reminds me of something else I've seen on 60 year old black and white footage taken in similar set ups. Kevin knows what I am talking about:

Citing the history of the refugee convention, forged after the horrors of the Holocaust during World War II in which millions of European Jews were murdered by the Nazi regime, Mr Rudd said: "This is deeply ingrained in my soul about what's important."

How do you reconcile the two statements? The plight of European Jews ingrained in his soul, but ready to lock up people for trying to flee to a secure country with a decent chance of survival.

Death by neglect. Just remember Kev, you now carry the license to kill. And the scary part is that he seems to have no qualms to use it. Following good old Labor tradition, he promised to snuggle up to the only country in the world openly threatening to use its nuclear arsenal, the mighty USA, but that’s probably because their flag looks a bit like ours and is sporting the ALP colours of red, blue and white.

Let me state unequivocally that America remains an overwhelming force for good in the world. Let me state equally unequivocally that America remains an overwhelming force for strategic stability in the region.

Not a word about how the USA has yet again invaded a foreign country and in no time killed upwards of 100'000 civilians and maimed many more. Not a syllable about how this big friend of ours is instigating military coups across the world, their "water-boarding is not torture" camps. Overwhelming force for good. My arse Kevin.

But then, what do I read, cheng beng in the middle of the new Prime Minister's ALP security policy:

...Australia’s participation in the war in Iraq represents the single greatest failure of national security policy since Vietnam...

How is that possible? The two greatest failures of our security policies were both times the result of following the overwhelming force for good into senseless wars, killing millions. My oh my, Kevin, Kevin, Kevin, your hypocrisy stinks to the heavens mate. An apologist if I've ever seen one.

Any schmonz coming from George Bush is regurgitated and presented as Australia's best interest, see also his stance on Iran:

Iran is now casting a longer shadow over the Persian Gulf and the wider Middle East. Iran’s influence in Iraq itself through the Shia majority adds to the overall picture of strategic destabilisation. And this emboldened Iran (a state which has long supported terrorist organisations like Hezbollah and Hamas) continues with its nuclear activities.

So then Kevin, are Australian troops on stand by to assist the US & Israel in any military actions taken against Iran? In which drawer is the pair of socks?

The Illusionist at his Very Best

PM John Howard, performing tonight his latest magic trick. Watch the grand conjurer transform dismay into hope:

This from today's SBS News:

Poll, Iraqis disillusioned

Iraqis are feeling increasingly pessimistic and insecure about their future, four years after the US-led invasion of Iraq, according to a poll published today.

According to the survey, just 39 per cent of Iraqis questioned think things are going well in their lives, while only 35 per cent think their lives will improve over the next year.

Just 40 per cent believe the general situation will improve.

The poll, commissioned by the BBC and US broadcaster ABC News, made for generally bleak reading, with barely more than a quarter — 26 per cent — of respondents saying they felt safe in their own neighbourhoods.

Other basic necessities were also found to be lacking, with 88 per cent of respondents saying the availability of electricity was either "quite bad" or "very bad"...

And now to John Howard's magic trick. Abracadabra fidibus and we get this from today's The West Australian:

Cautious sense of optimism in Iraq: PM
Prime Minister John Howard says there is a new sense of cautious optimism in Baghdad...

Incredible, Joh Bjelke Howard is amazing, David Copperfield couldn't have done this better.

And just to make us really proud of John Howard, the SMH has a lovely piece on how the elevators work in the Liberal Party:

Howard excels when it comes to mates

YOU might call it the FOG syndrome. Friends of the Government just keep getting appointed to the commanding heights of the system, into key positions on government boards and instrumentalities that either compete with, or can have a profound effect on, Australian business.

...But the Howard Government has arguably taken it to the next level. While this is not to question their capacities, or suggest that they are not well qualified in their own right, many top jobs on government boards and agencies have gone to prominent supporters, heads of key business lobby groups, big financial donors to the Coalition parties, staffers, or people personally close to senior ministers.

The latest is last week's appointment of former senior private secretary to John Howard, cabinet secretary and now company director, Paul McClintock, as chairman of Australia's biggest private health insurer, the Commonwealth Government-owned Medibank Private. Just by-the-by, McClintock is also chairman of Symbion Health, a company with extensive interests in private health care, health centres, radiology and medical imaging, pharmaceuticals and other health products like vitamins.

Of course, the Government denies his appointment represents any risk of a conflict of interest, despite what, to the lay observer, would appear to be a fertile field with Symbion on one side as a health goods and service supplier and Medicare Private on the other as a major insurer and funder of such goods and services...

You Beauty! How can someone not vote for the Liberal Party, Australia's Grand Old Party. So sophisticated, so refreshingly corrupt, so magic.

.

Ever wondered why? JH explains:

Taken from Tim Dunlop's Blogocracy comments section:

austie:

Just a thought, why is it that it is the most disadvantaged in society who suffer the worst under the new industrial relation laws?

John Howard Jr:

Dear austie,

Simple question, simple answer: Because they were written by the Liberal Party. Single moms, people with disabilities, Uni students, pensioners, workers in the lower income brackets, doesn’t matter. The plebs need to understand that the business end of town needs to be looked after, and if that means having to shift money from the working class wallets to Big Biz profit & loss reports, then so be it. We are the Liberal Party, that is what we do.

Yours gleefully,

John Howard Jr

austie:

Dear John Howard Jr.,

I knew there must be a rational explanation, and it is reassuring to know that our beloved government, and Prime Minister work so hard to maintain only afterall, a reasonable standard of living for those who are the real most needy amongst us.

It is easy to forget how costly it can be to run the private yacht, not to mention how dear it is today simply to travel first class.

It is outrageous of course having to pay for the occasional slice of pizza, and a drop of Californian.

I appreciate your kind help in clarifying this complex situation for me.

Kind regards,

Your average mug.

John Howard Jr:

Hello austie,

good to hear that you are with us Liberals on this. Goes to show that there is still hope for Tasmania, if you pass on your e-mail addy I’ll promise to forward it to our Liberal Special Human Intelligence Team (Liberal SHIT) in Hobart, who will be more than happy to invite you to their SHIT meetings.

You see, we need people in the working class who are willing to defend us Uptown dwellers, who have a grasp on the fact that if there are no Big Business profits, the companies will leave Australia and go to India or China where they get away with paying a pittance and no unions to make a stink about it. And if there are no companies, there is no work. Simple. We therefore have to introduce Indian and Chinese wage levels & workers rights to Australia, you know, to save or possibly even generate jobs.

Of course there is always the lottery or e-bay with which you proletarians can escape the mortgaged suburbs and join us on the winner side. Thats what we Liberals stand for, Hope. So keep playing Keno and selling stuff on e-bay, you might be debt free one day, not through work, but through ingenuity and luck, thats what we Liberals stand for, Luck to the brave.

So, thanx for your reply. I trust you’ll be voting Liberal at the next election (no, better, for the rest of your life) and ensure the success of our IR Laws revolution, as it is about choices, your choices - live in Australia and work for a few dollars all day or live in China and work for a few dollars a day. Remember, under Labor you wouldn’t have this important choice.

Best wishes

John Howard Jr

austie:

Dear John Howard Jr,

It amazes me to learn, and I must say that it is hard for me to admit this, just how wrong I have been in my thinking. I have always had a profound interest in China, and the Chinse people and I can see now there really is no better way to learn about this ancient culture than by working much longer hours at Chinese rates. This all seems so obvious to me now that I am embarrassed to say that I did not realise it earlier.

Of course there is the economic side of this miracle too. After all my needs are simply and let’s face it, do we really need to eat everyday? Obviously if we reduce wages we can reduce the extravagant expenditure on things like unnecessary food, educational costs – I am sure you would agree – on children who should learn to stay in their proper places as servants and butlers to those too busy with the cares of the world to attend to their own immediate personal needs. Acknowledging that all employers and Liberal Politicians are omnipotent and obviously know far more that we do about what is right and wrong, why would we ever need health coverage, because if we work hard how can we ever possible get sick?

I must confess to a great sense of relief knowing as I now do our proper place in the scheme of things. I was wondering - this is just an idea from the top of my head, whether … we could introduce the Indian caste system here. This would simplify things enormously.

I truly appreciate your comments … to say that the light has finally gone on in my dark abyss of ignorance … well … words fail me.

I remain eternally indebted to you for my sudden enlightenment.

Kind regards,

Your average mug

P.S.

When you left you shoes for polishing you didn’t tell me when you were going to collect them, so I have assumed that you will want them soonest. I apologise for not having them done earlier.

P.P.S.

I must admit to an embarrassment of a totally different kind now. It seems that, well … due to my lower wages that I just don’t have $10 today to pay you for this wonderful opportunity to clean your shoes, so I was wondering, is it OK if I pay you next week, or would you simply prefer to take my car?

John Howard Jr:

Hello Austie,

first up regarding the shoes, of course its alright if you pay me next week. Fortunately us Liberals have kept the interest rates low as promised, so you should be able to afford the slight increase in payments. I might take you up on your offer though and take the car (as collateral) until you made payment in full.

Secondly, as you pointed out correctly, food is so overrated and in our Liberal policy papers is fittingly classed as a luxury item. In a real workers paradise we don’t need that kind of lavishness, there is always the fingernails to chew on, who simply regrow and can be easily shared with friends or family. When the times get tough, the Liberals get going, welcome on board. When I pick up my shoes err.. sorry, when you drop of my shoes, ask my housekeeper to hand you the Liberal Guide to Clever Rationing And Poverty (CRAP), a must read for people who care about our lucky country. Getting by was never any easier.

Talking about education, as you might know, us Liberals have always been in favor of pragmatic and outcome based learning, preferably centered around the concept of mutual obligation. Children should learn the skills to succeed in later life, so knowing how to set a table or vacuum your employer’s car is essential to achieve their goals in adulthood. In order to be able to fill in a ballot paper correctly come election time, kids should also learn how to recognise the word Liberal. So there is lots to be taught, on the job training being the preferred method, and under a liberal government you can rest assured the costs to parents will be not exceeding their life savings.

Finally, I really like your idea of Australia adopting the Indian caste system, or at least make it official, because, and lets be honest about this, effectively we actually have already implemented this scheme. Us Liberals think ahead, our core quality which sets us apart from the rest of the field, a liberal trademark so to speak that is appreciated by the Australian electorate and industry. You might have noticed that I rarely speak to working class people and I encourage all my fellow Bentley Club members to take a similar approach when dealing with the masses. This guarantees an orderly society where people know their place whilst fulfilling our human need for belonging.

I appreciate your lines of encouragement and, with warm regards, remain

Yours truly

John Howard Jr

.

Exit Under Construction

…If you stand up and say your policy is to bring about a withdrawal of all combat units by March 2008, that is noted by terrorist leaders. It is a source of encouragement and comfort,…

PM John Howard
Hansard
12th February 2007

What a classic, the COW will stay till the insurgency disappears, just like when one pushes a red hot iron in ones eyeball long enough the pain will go away.

The so popular coalition troops have to watch every step they make outside their fortresses, fear almost every person they meet on the streets. The hearts and minds who haven’t been won or arrested yet (lets say the insurgents and their supporters within the Iraqi population) are numbering in the millions.

The enemies of our troops have lived in that country/trench for generations and will do so for generations to come. US forces come for 6 monthly stints, with their wives and children back home in the U Safe America. They operate on a complete different time scale than the Iraqi population. For the COW soldiers to “wait out” the insurgency would mean they’d have to move there, probably forever.

Military counter-insurgency measures against an enemy who actually lives in the warzone is like punching your fist into a bucket of water, the moment you pull it out its back to how it was. I guess that is what the huge permanent bases are for, to leave the fist in the bucket (if permanent military bases in Iraq are such a good idea, maybe Australia should build one too), although I suppose they are seen by many Iraqis as ulcers with all the ugly consequences this will entail.

Despite the good intentions the troops have, their daily efforts to rebuild the country and finding the alleged bad guys, I am afraid to say, if anything, the US presence fuels the enemy’s recruitment drive. Been fighting the "enemy" now for 4 years in Iraq, but they don't seem to get less.

To stay the course as suggested by John Howard, to stick with the US till "the Iraqi people can look after their own security" or along those wishy washy lines, underlines the lack of strategies to deal with the current scenario.

Cheney, Howard and their ideological associates, who want to keep combat troops in Iraq till the day when US soldiers on leisure time can peacefully sit in a suburban café in Baghdad and mingle with the locals, till the day when the last "terrorist", militia man and insurgent has been captured or killed by Iraqi troops, envision a day that is as likely to arrive in Iraq as the Titanic in NY. No waiting will change this. Too many mistakes have been made by the captain and the guys on the lookout.

And still, in John Howard's support it is argued that the whole issue of deadlines for withdrawals is meant to make us feel better, the US and Australian electorate, rather than the Iraqi people themselves.

According to their way of thinking it is Senator Obama and Kevin Rudd and other friends of this withdrawal idea who should examine their motivations a bit more carefully.

However, many polls and surveys show that a lot of Iraqis want the US troops to leave, and I can almost guarantee that’s not because they want to make us feel better. More likely it’s because in a lot of areas living conditions have gotten progressively worse since the invasion, and that not just in terms of security.

If one actually examines the reasons for why the US troops are in Iraq, one might want to consider this:

…Iraq possesses huge reserves of oil and gas -- reserves I'd love Chevron to have access to…

Kenneth T. Derr
Chairman of the Board and Chief Executive Officer
Chevron Corporation
Speech To the Commonwealth Club of California
San Francisco, California
November 5, 1998

And, voila, 9 years later they have, more access than most other countries would give private corporations. Comments by analysts to the newly approved Iraqi National Oil laws:

…Iraq will not be capable of controlling the levels -- the limits of production, which means that Iraq cannot be a part of OPEC anymore. And Iraq will have this very complicated institution called the Federal Oil and Gas Council, that will have representatives from the foreign oil companies on the board of it, so representatives from, let’s say, ExxonMobil and Shell and British Petroleum will be on the federal board of Iraq approving their own contracts.

…the law certainly opens the door to US oil companies and the Bush administration winning a very large piece of their objective of going to war in Iraq, at least winning it on paper. The law does almost word for word what was laid out in the Baker-Hamilton recommendation, which I discussed previously on your show, which is, at the very basic level, to turn Iraq's nationalized oil system, the model that 90% of the world’s oil is governed by, take its nationalized oil system and turn it into a commercial system fully open to foreign corporate investment on terms as of yet to be decided...

IMHO, the motivations for the invasion are the determining factor for the time of withdrawal. The exit strategy for Iraq hinges on the original objectives being achieved. From the initial US support of Saddam Hussein in the war against Iran, to the harsh sanctions against Iraq after the Kuwait invasion, to Operation Shock and Awe, to Fallujah, to Abu Ghraib, I get the impression that the well being of the common Iraqi was never really the main concern of the West's engagement in that country. The primary objective appears to be more of economic and geo-strategic nature, oust Saddam Hussein and secure Iraq's oil supply for western oil cos, and whilst there establish some bases near Iran, Russia and Israel.

Saddam is dead, the oil laws are almost passed and the bases are as good as finished. And so, should the surge fail, which it is bound to do, the US military is according to Sec Def Gates planning to pull out some of its contingent fairly soon. Well, better see what Cheney and Howard have to say about that.